Friday, September 10, 2004

I'm Back...I'm Back...Let Me Hear You SAY YEEEAAAAAH!

Yes...Yes...Yes...It's been along time since I have been in the house (1 month and 20 days to be exact)...But I'm back! Yes this is your favorite blog spiritual advisor...Rev. Park My Cadillac...I had to take a little vacation...I had to rest cause we all need our rest...So I went to St. Lucia to get back at one with my mission...And that is to deliver the "word"...Amennnn, Amennnn...It feels really, really good to be back in the House of Blog...Last time I left you with a little word on finances...Well today Imma give you with a little more...Imma do like Missy...Immma...Imma...I...I...Imma "Hit 'Ya Wit Da Hee...I stop 'em with the haaa (I stop 'em with the haaa)"...Is that how yall young folks say it...But anyway...I would like you all to turn to the book of Checks...The 21st chapter...And their it reads...

21st Century Act, "Check 21"

New Check Law

Starting in late October (October 28, 2004 to exact), a new check law will allow checks to clear in hours instead of days.

Under the Check 21 law, consumers will enjoy less float, meaning that checks they write to others will clear faster.

But banks won't be under any obligation to speed up the process for consumers depositing checks because the new law does not shorten check hold times.

Industry sources say, under the new law, 7 million more checks will bounce each year, costing millions more in fees each month.

The aim of the new law is to cut the $2 billion cost of processing paper checks.


Now the Feds done put a crook in the game...We live by the floating check...For all of you all that never been through the floating check cause you got it like that...Let me break it down...Say its Thursday...You have no money in your account...Your bill is due that Thursday...You get paid on Friday (the organ playing)...You got that direct deposit...Now you go ahead and right that check on Thursday...Cause you know that your checkaaaaah isn't going to go through untl Early...I said early...I SAID EARLY(high pitched voice)!!! That Monday Morning...Because usually it gets stuck from processing cause Saturday & Sunday aren't business days...And everything is alllllllllright...But on October 28, 2004...All that stops...You can't write that check and beat it to the bank that next morning...The governement are some truuuuuuuue...I said some truuuuuuuuuue...Haters...So for now until October 28...Get ya "Float On"...But after that it must stop...The doors of the church are open...Don't forget your love offerings....There will be an usher to take all collections in the comments box....All yeah we will not be taking anymore checks after October 28...But we still take Cash, Credit Cards, Money Orders, and even EBT...And also remember that tomorrow...Everybody say tomorrow (congregation repeats)...We will be having a fish fry to collect money for the "building fund"...Now turn to your neighbor and tell them, "Are gonna be there, cause I'm going to be there and I hope to see you there" (chuckle, chuckle, chuckle)...Amennnn, Amennnn...You can get your tickets from sister Stephanie and sister Misty out in the lobby...So to all the congregation...Keep On Keeping On...I'll keep you posted

6 comments:

Stephanie said...

Passa...ain't nobody bought no fish plate yet...lol

Liz said...

LMAOOOOO!!! The gubment sho' is a bunch of haters!! Man I had that check floating thing down to an art...

G. Cornelius said...

Who you telling...
rent takes 3 days
utilities take 5
credit cards take 1 (they be on it)
cable takes 2
Grocery store...3 to 4
I'm the sh!t

I'll keep you posted

Jazz said...

Yo G,...You are Hilarious!!

The check situation is F*cked Up! This is all design to keep the poor struggling masses down. First the "Borrow till Pay Day" places and now this.

Mata Hari said...

Oh how I love to float a check.....Fly Check Fly......like giving wings to your bill money situation....I think this law calls for a moment of silence....as I write some of the last rubber checks to my apartment complex, the cell phone people and the parking garage folks...

Just an FYI...if you are an out-of-state check holder then it adds an additional two days to the time it takes checks to clear...and really the "KEY" to check writing is doing it after 2pm...because it turns to the next business day and buys you one more day...

(i.e. a check written on a Wednesday after 2pm is like writing it on Thursday and with my bank being out of state...doesnt clear until Monday at Midnight...now that is having it down to a science)

MiniMee said...

LOL... (putting on the white usher board gloves at the back door)

And the chuuch said, "Amen"!

I'm highly upset at this revelation, LOL... that is some cold business if I've ever heard any.